The Painful, Valuable Lessons I Learned From Being A Victim Of A Crime

I am not a paranoid person by nature. I don’t think everyone is out to get me. I don’t cross the road when I see a gaggle of young men in hoodies and baggy jeans walking towards me. And I don’t stroll with my keys laced between my fingers as I walk through a parking lot.

I am an aware, smart, keen observer of life, or so I believed. 

After a fun night of singing and dancing away to Sister Sledge at the Soho House and still humming We Are Family, I arrive back at my flat around midnight to discover I had been burgled. A sick, thick feeling rose from the pit of my stomach that buckled my knees and sucked the oxygen from my lungs. My clothes were scattered across the room, jewellery boxes emptied and lying broken, and drawers were open and overturned. 

I stood there breathlessly in this twilight moment, the numb space between reality and disbelief. I had been robbed. 

Anyone who has been the victim of this kind of crime knows the incredible personal violation you feel. Someone has violently entered your personal space and turned it into a crime scene.

They say no experience is totally wasted if you learn something. Well, my experience was painful and costly, but I did learn something.

Here Are The Painful, Valuable Lessons I Learned From Being A Victim Of A Crime.

May my experience be your safety net.

Hide your valuables.

I was naive, thinking that my jewellery box was made for precisely that, a box for holding jewellery. It was pretty much like putting everything of value in one place with an electric neon sign screaming, “I’m over here, I’m over here”. I’m not saying you need to get a safety deposit box, as that has its own challenges, but don’t make it easy for criminals. Wrap up your valuables in tinfoil and put them in the freezer. Or hide them in an empty soup can or a box of biscuits. The last place burglars usually look is in the fridge.

Get homeowners’ insurance and make sure you know what the terms are.

There is a lot of fine print, so make sure your agent not only explains it to you but tells you if there is anything that might make the insurance null and void like you didn’t put the deadbolt on or have left a window open. The insurance companies are not going to make it easy. 

Back up your computer.

Your laptop is replaceable, the stuff on it is not. It is not enough, as I discovered, to back things up to an external hard drive, cause guess what, they stole my hard drive too. Back up all your data to the cloud. Losing my laptop was tough, but had I lost my manuscript for my upcoming book that took a year and a half to write, well, that would have been devastating. 

Use Find My, (previously known as Find My Phone).

Make sure all your devices (assuming you are an Apple user) have Find My activated. I’m sure there is an Android equivalent. With Find My, you can lock and erase your device remotely. This way, your passcodes, banking info and other important info is deleted from your stolen devices. You can even leave a message for whoever turns on the device. My message said, “To the bastards who stole this computer, you will burn in hell. (True story).

Keep the lights on.

I am sorry if this goes against the environment, and I still can hear my father’s voice ringing in my ears to turn the lights off when I leave a room, but criminals are far more likely to enter a place if it is dark and it looks like you are not at home. 

Take photos of your valuables.

I spent a ton of time going through old photographs to see what jewellery was missing or what favourite handbag was gone forever. Spend a rainy afternoon taking photos of your valuables and then create an album on your phone and back it up to the cloud. It likely won’t bring your stuff back, but it will help with the police report, it can be sent to pawnbrokers, and aid in your insurance claim. 

911 works, even in Europe.

In my panic, I totally blanked on the UK emergency number of 999. I mean, blanked. I later learned from the police that 911 is an international emergency code, and it will redirect your call to the local emergency number in the country you are calling from. 

Finally, breathe.

This is a traumatic experience. You have the right to be scared, angry and freaked out. I am all those things. Friends keep saying it’s only stuff, and sure, I wasn’t hurt, and at the end of the day, it is only stuff. But it is my stuff, and it meant something to me. Seek comfort in your friends, and if that is not enough, there are support groups you can join to help you move through this. Your local police will have names of places that can help.

Don’t think it can’t happen to you. It can. I share this with you, my readers, to help you avoid the horrible experience I have gone through. May my lessons spare you similar experiences. Be smart, aware... and to once again quote my father, don’t ever let the bastards get you down.

Stay safe my friends.