Love Across the Pond: The Dating Showdown Between British and North American Men

Welcome to the great international dating paradox. Who does it better?

As a single Canadian woman living in London, I’ve had my fair share of dates on both sides of the pond. And while I’d love to claim expert status—I mean I did kinda write an award-winning book, In Search of Mr Darcy: Lessons Learnt in the Pursuit of Happily Ever After—on the subject of men, I don’t know everything about this subject (phew). But you better believe I can talk about it.

I enlisted my girl gang—a highly qualified team of romantic research analysts to make this discussion even juicier. We’re focusing on city men and speaking in generalities, so if you’re easily offended, I suggest you swipe left.

If you’ve ever wondered how British and North American men compare when it comes to romance, charm, and commitment, buckle up. This is a head-to-head showdown of British Men vs. North American Men, complete with all their quirks, charms, and questionable texting habits.

Round 1: The Approach

British Men: Approaching a woman at a bar? Not unless they’ve had at least three pints and an enthusiastic pep talk from their mates. The British flirting style is subtle, often bordering on accidental. Think Hugh Grant in Four Weddings and a Funeral. Or, for that matter, any Hugh Grant movie.

North American Men: Much more direct. He’ll introduce himself, pay a compliment, and ask for your number—all before the ice melts in your Pimms. I bring into evidence Ryan Gosling in The Notebook (swoon). Confidence is key, and North American men put themselves out there without needing a lager-fuelled push.

🥊 Winner: North American Men. If you like clarity over cryptic pub banter, they’ll save you some guesswork.

Round 2: Manners

British Men: British culture is built on social protocol. Centuries-old traditions still linger, which means British men are more likely to stand when a woman arrives, walk on the outside of the sidewalk to shield you from traffic, or hold a door open without expecting a medal.

North American Men: They are truly oblivious to most of those niceties. Americans, in particular, are known to be brash, loud, and will happily tell you about their crypto investments or what they can bench press before you’ve ordered a drink. Canadians, ever the peacekeepers, tend to fall somewhere in between.

And let’s be honest—Dad Humor was definitely invented by a recently divorced guy from Chicago trying out his comedic chops.

🥊 Winner: British Men. No contest.

Side note: All men, regardless of nationality, are guilty of leaving the toilet seat up unless raised in a house full of women. Dudes, make an effort, put it down.

Round 3: Style

British Men: When I first moved to London, back when the UK was still joyfully part of the EU, I had one recurring question: Are they gay or European? British men are more metrosexual than their North American counterparts—though less so than the French or Italians (but that’s a whole other conversation). My British father always said you can judge a man by his shoes, and honestly, he wasn’t wrong.

North American Men: Since when did a hoodie and a backwards baseball cap count as date attire? Their wardrobe could take them from a ball game to a wedding with zero adjustments. And dirty sneakers? Unforgivable.

🥊 Winner: British Men. Maybe it’s the James Bond effect, but even on a casual date, you’re unlikely to see their Tommy Hilfiger waistband peeking above low-slung jeans.

Round 4: The First Date

British Men: The good news? You’re going to the pub. The bad news? You’re going to the pub. The drinking culture is strong in the UK, so dates tend to be low-key, involving pints, a sticky table, and possibly his mates. You may not even realize you’re on a date. And if the night goes well? The only late-night move might involve a kebab.

North American Men: More variety. Whether it’s a coffee date, a trendy cocktail bar, or even an activity (hiking, live show, rooftop drinks), North American men tend to put more effort into planning. And make no mistake—you will know if he’s into you. Why? Because he will tell you.

🥊 Winner: North American Men. More creativity, less ambiguity. Unless, of course, you love a no-pressure pint and immediate introductions to his entire friend group.

Round 5: Communication

British Men: If you enjoy playing Was that flirtation or just British politeness?, you’re in luck. Expect dry humor, minimal emojis, and a vague “Fancy a drink?” text—usually days after you met.

North American Men: If they are into you, they’ll actually text back. And sometimes before you even get home from the date. A simple “Had a great time tonight! When can I see you again?”—a phrase that might send a British man into cardiac arrest. That said, North American men are also more likely to ghost. Bad manners indeed.

🥊 Winner: North American Men. Love it or hate it, clarity is king.

Bonus Round: What Women Say About Them

British Women:
"I’m so sick of English men. All they do is drink beer and watch football."

American Women:
"I want to meet an English man because all American men do is drink beer and watch football."

Moral of the story? No matter where you go, the men are always greener on the other side of the pond.

Final Verdict? It Depends on What You Want!

Want charm, subtle wit, and a love of the pub? Go for a British man. Want directness, effort, and clear intentions? North American men might be your match.

Either way, one thing’s for sure: dating will always be a hilarious, slightly confusing, and wildly entertaining adventure.

Does anyone else miss when smoky bars, too much alcohol, and poor judgment decided your romantic future? (sigh).

Christina Ford is the award-winning author of In Search of Mr Darcy: Lessons Learnt in The Pursuit of Happily Ever After