LONDON’S 12 MOST PHOTOGRAPHED PUBS ~ I CAME, I DRANK, I INSTAGRAMMED

If you have visited London, let’s say in the last six hundred years or so, chances are good you have spent a little time in one of their 3,500 pubs. There is nothing so quintessentially British than raising a pint with your mates. These public houses have been the centre of British activity for centuries, not only serving up ale to the lads, lords and lasses but housing weary travellers, feeding ploughman lunches and Sunday roasts to families and hosting a variety of activities like darts and Quiz Nights.

Britain has pubs, America has bars.

Generally speaking, or should I say, generally drinking, pubs are different than your typical American bar culture. To start with, pubs are kid-friendly, often occupying pubs the same way Americans occupy coffee shops. But it’s more than that. They most usually have some fascinating history and tales to tell.

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16 Must-Have Apps Everyone Over 40 absolutely Needs

I'm going to be straight up honest with you, this getting older thing has its disadvantages. I can throw my back out from trying to hold in a sneeze. I can walk into a room and completely blank out what I went in there for, and don't get me started about how my whole world comes to a grinding halt if I can't find my reading glasses.

Saying that I thought I would share with you 16 Must-Have Apps for us folk who have slipped into the other side of 40. And for you youngsters, take note, there might be a thing or two that might benefit you as well.

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15 Awesome Perks and Benefits to Living Alone

Most of my life, I have been living with someone. Of course, it started with my parents and sisters. Those were the days with more rules than freedom, and blood was often shed, and fistfuls of hair torn from their roots when I'd find my sister wearing my new jean jacket she swore up and down she never took. Then I moved out and got roommates, and that too came with a whole set of compromises, general lack of personal space and questionable hygiene standards, i.e.) A clogged shower drain with hair clearly a different colour than my own. Then I got married…and had kids…and well, not only was I never alone, I was completely surrounded.

In the last couple of years, I have been blissfully living on my own. My kids are launched, no live-in boyfriend leaving the toilet seat up, the used teabag in the sink or the untimely discovery of an empty toilet roll, and I have to say it is unparalleled rapture.

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10 Things Brits Do That Drive Me Crazy

Ok, maybe it has been the result of the last year and a half stretching everyone, including myself, Petrie dish thin. But I’ve been finding my tolerance lower than usual. I mean sub-zero, don’t look at me the wrong way, or I might have to squash your will to live, kinda low. As a result, a few things have bubbled to the surface I thought I’d take the time to share.

There are some things that the Brits do that I fail to understand or tolerate. I’m guessing there is an equally compelling list of rants that I’m sure drive Brits mental about their North American counterparts. And please…my British readers, bring forth your list.

Sure there are stereotypes between the stand-offish, horse-loving snobs with bad teeth versus the gun-wielding, overweight loud Trump supporters who want to Super Size everything. But for the most part, that’s not what my rant is about. On both sides of the ocean, there are good and not so good traits and customs.

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A BROAD IN LONDON'S 20 LIFE HACKS FOR THE SINGLE GIRL

So you tell me single ladies, has this happened to you?

You are getting ready for a night out, you slip into that sensational, sexy tight dress, the one you know is going to slay, and you realize, that the last six inches of that back zipper is impossible for you to do up by yourself. I mean, not a chance. Perhaps this is the real reason women do yoga, to develop the contortion like flexibility in ones’ shoulders to enable you to do this task yourself. Sorry, but do designers think I have a ladies-maid dressing me? I am not Lady Mary Crawley.

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Mad Magazine’S Genius Zodiac Summary…It Ain't No Bull.

That’s A Lot Of Bull….A Brilliant Mad Magazine Zodiac Summary.

If you’re of a certain vintage and grew up in North America, if I said Alfred E. Neuman immediately that redhead, gapped tooth cover-boy should instantly spring to mind. The face that looks a lot like David Letterman in cartoon form smiling at us from the covers of Mad Magazine.

Mad Magazine was a fixture of my childhood. A satirical humorous slam deep into the hub of the 20th century cultural landscape.

So you might be asking yourself, so what does the Zodiac and Mad Magazine have to do with each other? Well, I’ll tell you. It is where I first read the most dead accurate horoscope profile EVER. It so resonated with me that decades later I could find myself reciting by heart lines from its brilliant astrological summary. I mean who could forget…

“Sagittarius you will find will say whatever’s on his mind.”

That literally could describe every Sagittarius I have ever known...and dated.

So I thought I would dig up Mad’s Zodiac and see what you think. I dare you to contradict the brilliant, accurate summary of each and every Zodiac sign.

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WHAT YOU CAN SAY AT DINNER...THAT YOU CAN ALSO SAY DURING SEX


So, yup, it has come to this. Sex!

And it doesn't hurt having my favourite Canadian family, The Roses from Schitt’s Creek, joining me from their diner.

With the word “sex” prominently featured in my headline, I believe I have secured your attention, at least for the moment. The real question will be, if this word “sex” lures more of you into reading this than the word “bacon”? My last blog about that fabulous fatty breakfast meat weirdly was my most opened blog in my blogger history. Seriously, bacon!!!

So, let’s see if more of you are interesting in sex… or bacon?

I was playing this game with a friend of mine that inspired me to write this blog, What You Can Say At A Dinner Party That You Can Also Say During Sex. This I found entertainingly rude, like Cards Against Humanity, funny, and certainly more creative than your average game of charades.

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Everyone Loves Bacon

Ok, maybe it's because I've been pretty much trapped in my flat for a year now, and my brain has gone a little funky. I mean, it's hard to be writing about A Broad In London if all I'm experiencing is a thirty-minute walk to the Waitrose (weather dependant) or my unsanctioned hair colouring in the dimly lit basement of my stylist's salon. I mean, we are living in a world right now where it's legal to roll yourself a big fatty and get high on the streets of Toronto but not get your hair highlighted. This world has gone to pot, literally.

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13 THINGS TO LOOK FORWARD TO IN 2021

Well, I am just going to go ahead and say it, Good Riddance 2020. Absolutely no one is going to miss you. I recognize that we are only a short time into this new year but I am cautiously optimistic that good things are coming our way. Sure not all of it will be immediate, but soon…and with the promise that 2021 will be greatly improved over its predecessor. I am looking forward to doing stuff, I am looking forward to stuff to look forward to…does that make any sense? What 2020 has taught us that even with the best-laid plans things can go awry, off the rails…and sometimes there is squat one can do about it.

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CHRISTMAS 2020. HO, HO...FRICKIN HO!

Well, it’s that time again this year… or is it?

You don’t need to hear from me to tell you how unusual this year has been or how this time has been challenging, God, don’t we all know it. There has been many a time I just want to run from my flat screaming, “Screw you 2020, you’re not the boss of me.” But in fact, it has been the boss of me… the boss of all of us.

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AMERICA, WHAT IN THE WORLD HAPPENED TO YOU?

America, I don’t understand.

I am a Canadian woman living in Great Britain. I tell you this because I am neither a Republican or Democrat. Nor am I interested in being corralled by my American friends who find the need to identify, sort, convert and brand me to any form of their country’s politics.

I am however a moralistic human being who does not believe that government, church, state, priests, rabbis, teachers or anyone for that matter should tell me who I can love, who I should hate and what I can do with my body. I believe in being kind to strangers, that no lives matter unless black lives matter. That bullies cannot be placated to, equal rights for all, you know…all the basic stuff they taught us in kindergarten.

As a Canadian, I grew up idolizing you America. An incredible superpower country that leads by shining example. Whose gold standards created benchmarks for literature, cinema, science, democracy and medicine which led and inspired the world to do better. I looked up to you much like a little kid idolizing an older brother or sister. Cooler, bigger, stronger, smarter, more popular and always…always made me feel safe. But America you now terrify me

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The Man Catalogue. What A Man's Online Dating Photo Says Instantly About The Guy

There are three great tellers of truth, Children, yoga pants, and a man’s online dating photo.

So let us discuss the later, those murky often funky waters of online dating.

This of course told thru the filter of someone old enough to nostalgically and fondly remember when my sole decision-making of a potential partner would all but be decided by a drunken fuelled evening in a bar called Brandy’s.

I guess you can call me kinda old fashioned in that regard. Back in an era of jam-packed bars and nightclubs (remember those?) with bodies pressed so close you could smell the battle between his warm, Barcardi infused breath on your neck and his Jovan Musk For Men that he clearly bathed in earlier. A cute smile and one too many tequila slammers and that was it. The next thing you know you are picking out china patterns and arguing why his friend Snake under no circumstances will be sitting at the same table as your friend Bunny at the reception. Personally I think it is obvious.

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My 14 DAY Quarantine. It Was Like I Was Trapped In A Bad Episode Of Black Mirror

I recently returned to Toronto from the UK to spend the sweet, hot months of summer in my Motherland. The most cherished time of the year that all Canadians live for, have valiantly earned, yet still, actively bitch about. It is why we endure the harsh brutal cold of winter, excavating our cars from under a heavy slab of snow like some archeological dig. Running our white numb fingertips under hot water to regain the use of our hands. We more than any other people have earned every minute of every day that the sun is beating down on our pale white Canadian skins.

So when I had to spend 14 days in quarantine in the height of summer I found it way harder and more like a psychological experiment. Like I was trapped in a bad episode of Black Mirror.

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To All You Fabulous Single Moms, This Is For You

It is said that there is no harder job in the world than parenting, and I couldn’t agree more.

My daughters, when they were forced out of my body they had clutched in their tiny fists, half of my heart in one hand, and half my brain in the other. You bring them home shocked that the hospital actually let you leave with them cause you know NOTHING about looking after a baby, raising children, or how to prevent that eventual teenager from doing all the stupid shit you did.

Yet there you are, flying totally blind with what only can be described as the world’s worst roommate.

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The World In The Time Of Coronavirus. The Quiet Eerie Beauty of Empty Streets

It is not often the world is so quiet. One could easily mistake the peace for calm if one did not know better. Every corner of every city is silent, sleeping, waiting to awake from an uneasy, long sleep. As the world waits to emerge from the Coronavirus pandemic that has hit over 185 different countries I thought I would share you with some of the most outstanding photographs from around the globe, and what it looks like when the world holds its breath… and waits.

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Interesting Things To Do While Forced To Stay Inside During The Coronavirus

There is a Chinese curse that says, “may you live in interesting times”.

Well, I think that we can all agree that these are pretty damn interesting times. The worldwide pandemic Covid-19 is forcing many of us to stay indoors or practice social distancing. But not all is at a complete loss. If you are strong and healthy there are ways you could make the best of this imposed upon new found time.

I compiled a list to help us all stay a little saner as we’re hunkering down at home.

Interesting Things To Do While Forced To Stay Inside During The Coronavirus

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If There Is One Place You Need To See Before You Die, Let It Be Vietnam.

Vietnam. I could go on and on about the vast variety of things to see in Vietnam. Its stunning physical beauty, the friendly welcoming people or its complex history. Or I could credit Anthony Bourdain’s culinary exploration of the delicious food I discovered as I ate my way across the country not gaining a single pound (take note Italy and France).

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THE VAGINA MUSEUM, I WENT DOWN...TO SEE IT

Seriously, is there anything that London doesn’t have?

We know that London is known for its rich culture, its variety of museums and a plethora of galleries. In fact according to CNN Travel not only does London have the most number of museums in the world, but Londoners also have the highest percentage (53.6) of people attending their museums and galleries. So it should come as no surprise to anyone that London has the first (and maybe only) museum dedicated to celebrating the vag, muff, vajayjay, beaver, love button, red wagon, pink bearded clam, vulvarine or whatever you like to call it, and why not?

Iceland has a museum dedicated to the penis… you know…to give you something else to do once you bore of those spectacular Northern Lights.

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It's The Most Magical Time of The Year. Christmas in London 2019. There is no place on earth quiet like it.

So what if it gets dark at 3:30 in the afternoon and the nights last longer than a snowman in the artic, it is Christmas time and London is TOTALY lit. Each neighborhood has elaborately decorated their storefronts, cafes, hotels, parks, and streets as they throw festive block parties to “turn on the lights” and celebrate the arrival of the Christmas season.

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Grievances, Pet Peeves and Rants of a 50 Something, Menopausal Women

I have written about things that made me elated and happy, music that caused my heart to dance out of my chest and little things that sparked joy. So I thought it was time that I turn this on its ear and rattle on about the things that really..and I mean REALLY piss me off.

I call it, a good old-fashioned, “don’t get me started” rant. 

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