Did Tinder Kill Love? Yup, I Think So.

Sex has always been the alleged road to love.

For generations, people have been hooking up at parties, nightclubs, smokey singles bars, or discos (depending on just how old you are). A nostalgic, romantic epoch where poor judgement and too much alcohol made your relationship decisions for you (sigh).

So here we are today, deep in the throes of a new era, the online dating universe ruled by Tinder, Bumble and their near-distant relations. With instantaneous access to this colossal volume of singles seeking sex, love and relationships, you would think it would have triggered a new epic sexual revolution. One so explosive, so massive, that we, like feral rabbits, would be feasting on a 24/7 service of super-swipers strangers, Tinderellas that come delivered right to your door with the reliability of UberEats.

Well, guess what? We are having less sex! A lot less.

Since the onset of online dating (Tinder est. in 2012), we are having less sex. All of us.

Less than our parent's generation and again, depending on how old you are, your grandparents too. I also read that ⅛ of Millenials are still virgins by age 26. Not sure who these people are, but pretty sure they aren't living in Soho. And since, as I've said above, sex has always been the alledged road to love, there is less coupling, fewer people falling in love and fewer marriages…And I am blaming Tinder… for all of it.

SO, DID TINDER KILL LOVE? YUP, I THINK SO.

According to Karolinska Institution in Sweden, this downward trend includes both sexes, but there has been more of a proportional drop in men.

Sure, one could look at the various reasons, as there are a lot more choices of things to do late on a Saturday night these days than hanging out at the Dairy Queen or cow-tipping. Reasons like; working too hard, being too busy, on our phones, streaming endless content, gaming, still living with mom and dad, or mom and mom, or dad and dad.

Perhaps online porn is to blame, maybe that's the reason, and men have just gotten lazy-er. But that same study says, nay.

In theory, online dating should have made it easier to find new partners, but time spent online has displaced time once spent in face-to-face social interactions. And with 24-hour availability thanks to our smartphones, we are not meeting people like we used to. Many of my friends speak about online dating in one of two ways; an app used purely for entertainment when they have nothing else to do (how sexy)… or as a necessary evil that can bring out the absolute worst in humanity. Hmmm? The most common stories I hear start with benign, beige chats that go back and forth for weeks on WhatsApp. They discuss what books they read, their jobs, or what they are currently bingeing on Netflix instead of being out amongst the living… until one day, it finally just "poofs" evaporates. That, my friends, is time wasted. If that same initial meeting took place live, in a bar or club perhaps, you would know very quickly, if not immediately, if you wanted to see that person naked, and it has nothing to do with what book is sitting on their bedside table. Instead, you go through weeks of drivel to finally discover this person has all the sexually allure of your Great Aunt Olga.

Another theory that seems prevalent, it appears that there is too much choice.

Much like feeling overwhelmed in a restaurant if their menu reads like War and Peace. You picked something, cause it looks tasty, but on the second visit or maybe the third, you’re wondering if perhaps you missed out when you ordered the salmon au croute, thinking maybe you should’ve gone for the spicier curry vindaloo.

As one cannot replicate that moment, that intensity, that feeling of meeting someone face to face by staring at a tiny screen, and you certainly can't predict it, this single mother of two is throwing down the Tinder gauntlet. I challenge you, my single, sassy friends, to put down your phones, get your complacent ass off the sofa, get out there, buy a complete stranger a drink, and smile. Let's take back the night, scream-sing a little Toby Keith, How Do You Like Me Now…. and tell Tinder just where they can shove it.

Perhaps if we all started approaching each other in person again, we'd learn who we're actually attracted to, and in that, find ourselves not only having more sex – but having better sex. And as always, this sexy sister is up for a good challenge.

I look forward to hearing your stories, and rest assured…I will be sharing mine.